when is it now
mardi 31 juillet 2012
ça aurait pu marcher, mais ça a couru et je n'ai pas pu le rattraper, le temps n'est pas pour moi, tout va loin et je ne voudrais que du près, du possible, mais il faut se faire une raison, car il n'y en a qu'une, toutes les autres vont à la poubelle du destin, j'étais quelqu'un, mais voilà que tout se transporte au delà des limites, je suis un homme pas un dieu, je réfléchis sans me poser les bonnes questions, mais comment pourrais-je faire autrement, je ne suis qu'un humain né au vingtième siècle, pas de miracle, des organes qui s'usent, une déception qui grandit, quand j'étais petit, je ne réfléchissais pas, c'était le bonheur et puis un jour je me suis mis à penser, ce fut le début de la fin
comment comprendre que le temps ne soit pas de mon côté mais c'est pour ça aussi que je suis vivant, alors je ne me plains pas, je hurle d'impatience de me trouver encore là à penser, quand pourrais-je m'abstenir de me plaindre, avancer comme une feuille qui tombe de l'arbre, elle n'y peut rien et elle ne dit rien, simplement son heure est arrivée avec l'automne, elle savait au printemps que son temps était compté, mais elle n'en a fait qu'à sa tête, verte comme une pomme verte, heureuse de danser dans le vent chaud, sans jamais avoir peur de décrocher, les jours passent jusqu'au pic de l'été, belle vigueur mais cependant une rougeur sur les pointes, rien de bien grave, mais d'un coup le vent change, il tourne, tourne, fragilise, les humains courbent le dos, on attend le froid et les arbres nus,
une seule fois j'ai raté l'occasion de comprendre la fin de l'histoire, c'était quand je suis né, depuis que j'ai l'âge de mettre un mot devant l'autre pour faire une phrase, je n'ais cessé de chercher d'où venait le fluide, ce liquide qui passe de générations en tombes décorées, l'humain s'écrase dans la terre, mais avant de le faire, il s'agite, une énergie considérable pour se lever le matin, pour donner de l'argent à un pauvre, je suis riche par rapport à d'autres, mais lesquels exactement, bref, tout ça ne mène à rien mais on le fait quand même histoire de ne pas être celui qui passe à côté de sa vie, à côté de la pourriture, alors qu'on peut être en plein dedans
au moment où je commence je sais que je finis, mais entres les deux, que se passe-t-il, je n'ai pas encore découvert qui je suis, mais le fait de penser me permet de voir ce qui peut intervenir dans l'élaboration de conditions claires pour tous, pour commencer j'aimerais m'attarder sur les courts instants qui comptent pour rien, il sont nombreux, un regard, un geste, un pas hésitant, ne suis-je que ce tas d'organes défaillants, je ne vais pas me plaindre mais mon corps ne me répond pas, j'y habite depuis des années mais plus ça va moins je ne comprend son attitude agressive quand j'essaye de le prendre du bon côté de la vie, par moment j'ai même l'impression qu'il me plante son drapeau noir sur l'esprit gémissant, triste vie qui finit mal, mais le moment est vainqueur, je suis maintenant dans la possibilité de comprendre le plus petit des artifices du mirage de l'espérance, rien ne reste après la perte de la joie, des morceaux de conscience, des piles d'assiettes sales, en avant sans se retourner sur la ville honteuse, vive la campagne, son air pur et des individus étriqués au milieu de la nature généreuse, mais pour le moment je préfère habiter en ville au milieu de la population et de la pollution, pour que mon corps paye ce qu'il a à payer, un peu de savoir sans penser à mal, mais ça compte quand même, un peu c'est déjà beaucoup
in the certainty of the moment I feel like a pressure, am I in the right place at the right time is a problem I encounter more and more often, I would not be interested in being elsewhere at another time, but time passes and I stay where I am unable to bring myself to move, what is more satisfying than being without asking questions, it is now and then the rest we put it in the trash, another day off , which is something of the past, we'll see tomorrow if the earth is still spinning or if the grocer is still open on Sunday and I count on him to sell me my bottle of wine on Sunday night, how would I otherwise, it is time to think about something else, for example I'm trying to see something original, it happens on a train or car, the first or the second I lose my memory since I pass me some ointment on the face, is there a correspondence
into a coherent whole is difficult to know who we are, we must come out for itself, a solitude that makes you dizzy, but I had a choice, life out before me a plate, it is full, but I will not eat, I watch what happens and I decided to take a towel, a simple gesture is not binding, a small foray into closed enclaves of desire, anything is possible here, it may understand or to live in the illusion, the impression is contained, breath is long, the interruption is impossible, everything is designed to withstand boredom, we live, it's good without danger of taking a wrong road is marked so as to steer without straining, and finally the utmost care is taken with the agreement, a great way to pass time, but it is already time to lose in order to meet, it is really delicious to see often and often forgotten
it was given to live, I did not ask but then one day by going to the cafeteria heavenly religious there gives beautiful, yes I said it does not buy anything here, you do not eat anything more, but to keep an air of earth, management has kindly created an atmosphere that evokes life on earth, it passes without envy but with nostalgia, it was on earth, breakfast in bed the morning andevening, afternoon, night, different times and that's so nice to breathe, a flower, a fresh poop, here we no longer feel anything, not worth it, is the eternal bliss, no need to superficial comfort, but at the same time we do not forget that the body sweats, the envy that goes up, the ice melts, I said nothing but as God knows everything, he knew I was tired of keep doing nothing while I do not know how long, a thousand years may be, here I go again, therefore, no specific assignment, will I be a priest or a bandit, how long will I live, six months or one hundred years is fashionable at the moment, I think I'll go right up to sixty, then it will go from bad to evil, the body collapses, the mind wanders, where are the famous Yesterday, at the cemetery or in books but
is often assumed not to be lost in reality, in all possibilities it is indeed a reality that could fit me properly, but I expect the world and I have no time to understand what I want obtained in a short time, as I am modern I can not let myself be drawn in a study that would take me all my life, okay we are living longer than before, but it has so much to do that were not before, it can include watching television at the same time the laundry is rotated in a washing machine is an extraordinary development that has not fifty years, for thousands of years people had no TV, no machine washing, there was no plane, no car, no dentist, by cons we always wanted, small, large, look for example drawings animals found in caves, designs that have hundreds of thousands of years, people have wanted to draw what they wanted to eat, they wanted to represent what they liked, in a gratuitous act without a reporter comes to ask questions
one can say things, but see where I am, where I breathe, the gas escapes death that feels, but the boredom of life, only simple, as it is heard, up there on the mountain, the tables for lunch, it's lunch time, is this the last, nothing to see while dining out, turn right, to miss the trees, feel nothing, it 'is empty, it was at this time, but once it was full, what to do, bounce back in what, I hesitate, too late, there was a flash, but envy is rising, it is the one that moves, everything else is asleep, that night, we sleep, the door slams shut, hopefully for a few hours the body does not think in any case he sleeps, he dreams, sweating, waking with a start Where am I, neuronal connections, rapid passage, renunciation, joy, lust, a glass of water, being, body, me, standing back in a horizontal position, but he had to go through it because the principle of Sudden passion is no longer relevant, we must return to the top, where it all started, watch your step, now it is time to understand why the sky is blue, because at first it was brown
Do not confuse the essence of the absurd in human activity because we do not choose the main passage, one is always obliged to go through some strange detours that lead nowhere, we would expect more success, why wait, what's the point not to go immediately to where you want to go, and no, we do not know where to go without having been anywhere else before, because how could you tell the difference between the time before and offset higher you climb, you climb down and finally, short or fast, what to choose, now is serious, it creaks like an old floor, there was a time when time was, but nowadays it depends on the Weather will always down, so it is up or down, I will not spend the day I realized that I'm not the one I believe, however, this morning I was fine, but now it goes, then what about the Queen, head coupons him, it's over now, but tomorrow will start in joy, I am sure now, something just happened that will make me joy for at least three days, then I do not know, it depends on the evolution of clouds, they come from the Western Front
let's be clear, it is important to be simple, in fact in general I think I can be what I am, but it often happens that the wind direction suddenly changes, then I try and cling to branches to do what I do not usual habits are not good to follow, it is urgent to change to try something new, be careful it will hurt, either, it depends on me in my ability to translate the time in any light is acceptable, indeed it appears that there is more, let me explain, you take an egg if he pulls out a chick, it is too late to make an omelette, this is how do without the essential history in a first class it is my duty to leave the last, that's how we move forward, one step before the other and vice versa, in an unstable equilibrium, it can fall at every step, so to avoid sinking in the certainty of envy under control I would just say that I am stronger in my life, then I go deep, I began to breathe, I descend to understand that time is moved to the other side, it is too late to try again, but I still hope in limited quantities, should I do and do it again, yet continue to explore without finding, days to search, nights sleeping, eating a simple life to live, how many dreams, I do not know, I forget them all, what interests me is reality, what happens there, what is my place, left side of the door, and before that nothing is behind me
life is a law we can not forget, it is with joy that I see every day his commandments, for years I am aware of everything that brings me good behavior towards the front, I don 'not like staying in one place, I must move to put into action deepest emotions, I try to stay on course, sometimes I stop environment, but I take the road quickly, I can not live without trying to pass through a narrow slit behind which I see the truth of life, it is an attempt, I want to do something, whatever it for me, I have a vital need to try to spend moments to be somebody in those times I escape to a harmonious reality, it is nice to feel carried by the wind, so what if every time I fall, the next opportunity will be good
la vie est une loi qu'on ne peut oublier, c'est avec joie que j'observe chaque jour ses commandements, depuis des années je suis conscient de tout ce que m'apporte la bonne conduite vers l'avant, je n'aime pas rester au même endroit, il faut que je bouge pour mettre en action mes sentiments profonds, j'essaye de garder le cap, quelques fois j'ai envi d'arrêter, mais rapidement je reprends le chemin, je ne peux pas vivre sans essayer de passer par un fente étroite derrière laquelle je verrai la vérité de la vie, c'est une tentative, je veux faire quelque chose, peu importe ce que ça me rapporte, j'ai un besoin vital d'essayer de passer des instants à être quelqu'un, dans ces moments-là je m'évade vers une réalité harmonieuse, il est beau de se sentir porté par le vent, tant pis si à chaque fois je retombe, la prochaine occasion sera la bonne
I see before me something weird, I'm getting closer and I realize that this is my face, I'm in front of a mirror that reflects what he sees, it does not do me, I wanted to go away and here I am stuck looking at me, when can I go beyond the limits known for the intoxication of the altitude, it is a project in the long term, it does not become immediately what we want be, especially in road you lose ideas departure, that's how life is proudly hand and arrive mid-term and wondered what we doing here, then to keep moving forward you have to ask help, I was ready to go time without looking back, it is an effort to live every day, we can not give up, here and now, life weighs, it will sink us one day, back in the water, there was early in the womb, a passage
je vois devant moi quelque chose de bizarre, je me rapproche et je m'aperçois qu'il s'agit de mon visage, je suis devant un miroir qui reflète ce qu'il voit, ça ne m'avance pas, je souhaitais aller loin et me voilà bloqué à me regarder, quand pourrais-je partir au delà des limites pour connaître l'ivresse de l'altitude, c'est un projet sur le long terme, on ne devient pas tout de suite ce qu'on voudrait être, surtout qu'en route on perd des idées du départ, c'est comme ça la vie, on part fièrement et on arrive à mi-parcours en se demandant ce qu'on fait là, alors pour continuer à avancer il faut demander de l'aide, j'étais prêt à parcourir le temps sans me retourner, vivre c'est un effort au quotidien, on ne peut abandonner, ici et maintenant, la vie pèse, elle va nous couler un jour, retour dans l'eau, on y était au début dans le ventre de sa mère, un passage
life shines soft lights and cheerful, it's nice in my body, I will, I am, but the problem is precisely the fate that mocks my wishes one day I was born unintentionally, one day I going to die unintentionally in between, I want to be what I am, a fierce desire that breaks the wall in front of fate, what happens is not wanted, because it happens it happens, it n 'there is no turning point, it goes straight to the end, a project like a bullet leaves the barrel, but boredom sets in, it takes time, it does not move, we wanted to go fast, but energy falls below, it must wait while the fire burns the house, that's how it is useless to make a decision, it does not work anymore, maybe one day could I m 'sit on a bench, and see that everything I wanted has led to nothing, life goes
la vie resplendit de lumières douces et joyeuses, il fait beau dans mon corps, je le veux, je le suis, mais justement le problème est la destinée qui se moque de mes voeux, un jour je suis né sans le vouloir, un jour je vais mourir sans le vouloir, entre les deux, je veux être ce que je suis, une volonté farouche qui se casse devant le mur de la fatalité, ce qui arrive n'est pas voulu, ça arrive parce que ça arrive, il n'y a pas de tournant, ça va tout droit jusqu'au bout, un projet comme une balle qui sort du canon, mais l'ennui s'installe, ça prend du temps, ça n'avance pas, on voulait aller vite, mais l’énergie tombe au plus bas, on doit attendre alors que le feu brûle la maison, c'est comme ça, il ne sert à rien de prendre une décision, ça ne marche plus, un jour peut-être pourrais-je m'asseoir sur un banc, et voir que tout ce que j'ai voulu n'a mené à rien, la vie passe
how long will I die, it's a question I ask myself when I feel in my body suspicious movements, what does that mean I'm not sick, my body lives, breathes, he suffers no longer young, but when will I know what happens, progress is not yet gone far enough, perhaps one day soon will we see inside the body and immediately understand what wrong, then with a quick movement on the computer connected to our cells, we could act and fix what's wrong, it's not yet the case, now we must settle for a decision blood for secondary information, that happens it really in the body, should have a vision of atoms, those billions of stars that compose us
dans combien de temps vais-je mourir, c'est une question que je me pose quand je sens dans mon corps des mouvements suspects, qu'est ce que ça veut dire, je ne suis pas malade, mon corps vit, il respire, il souffre de ne plus être jeune, mais quand vais-je savoir ce qui se passe, le progrès n'est pas encore allé assez loin, peut-être un jour pourrons-nous rapidement voir l'intérieur du corps et comprendre immédiatement ce qui ne va pas, alors d'un geste rapide sur l'ordinateur connecté à nos cellules, nous pourrions agir et réparer ce qui ne va pas, ce n'est pas encore le cas, aujourd'hui on doit se contenter d'une prise de sang pour avoir des informations secondaires, que se passe-t-il vraiment dans le corps, il faudrait avoir une vision des atomes, ces milliards d'étoiles qui nous composent
lundi 30 juillet 2012
I expect tons of nothing, that makes me wait, then I go right, it is my desire to go there, it does not work all the time in the same way, sometimes I can go further, then I tell myself that I must go back where I come from, it makes me feel good, I can make an effort, a very small step towards the next instant, but how to understand what is happening in me, I 'try to sit, but I can not do it, I must continue, it does not come right away, the moments are linked to become inedible porridge, but you get used to everything, c 'is the time to exist, there is no equivalent, I asked a question without waiting for the answer, too bad, I continue, I think in life you never answer, you can have questions, it is the freedom granted to us, but it stops there, it does not prevent me to be optimistic, tomorrow where will I be, it's an adventure that continues, why not
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